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Works out of the box on my manjaro install.

With your specific hardware drivers, on your specific Kernel revision.

I'm on manjaro and its miserably broken (recent aero laptop)

Why would you expect Linux to work well on a laptop designed for Windows? Do you also expect that MacOS will work on it?

A laptop designed for Windows.. Do you read the ASCII you output ? Does it compile in your mind? In mine it clearly doesn't.