I think a great response would be "That sucks, do you THINK if you spoke to them something would change?" Rather than "have you tried to speak to them?"
The first is a question, that will prompt them to think and then maybe act. The second is a question that is a little accusatory (you should have already spoken to them about it)
Conversation is hard!
You might try the combination of [name the feeling] + [broad question], like:
"That sounds frustrating. What have you tried to solve that?"
or ismply stating the feeling and letting them move towards solution ideas after their feeling has been established, like:
"It sounds like this is taking a lot of energy from you."
(wait, let them reply)
"Can you tell me what you're working through to try to fix this?"