Nano may be a great alt and worth considering.

But this rant, with all the trappings of a fanboy conspiracy theory has the exact opposite effect to what you are trying to achieve: just reading it made me want to close the tab and never look at nano again.

It took quite an effort to keep on reading.

Now, please present us with a concise and solid technical argument as to why nano's consensus methodology is better than bitcoin's.

And I don't want to hear about "features" (it does this, it does that), but arguments proving the methodology is as least as secure as Bitcoin's.