Ask HN: How much of a success/failure has your love life been?

Not directly answering the question but...

Over the past day on Ask HN we've had threads like:

> Anyone know any funny programming jokes?

> Enjoy today at 21:21:21 on the 21st day, of the 21 year of the 21st century

> What is your one song?

> How much of a success/failure has your love life been?

Is it just a coincidence to get so many threads that seem out of place in such a short period of time?

My love life was pretty much a zero. I didn't even bother asking anyone to proms in high school; I knew I wasn't going to get a "yes". I dated some, but nothing was really going anywhere. I felt frustrated - like I had love to give, but nobody to give it to. Then, when I was 27, I met someone and asked her out. We kind of connected, I kept asking her out, proposed, married her. It's been 30 years, and it's been OK at worst and really good much of the time.

Since my wedding, my marriage uptime has been 100.00000000000%! It's my most successfully maintained service.

Like most important things in life, primarily a failure. When I was a kid/teenager I was too focused on other things (which, surprise, didn’t pay off).

Since then, I’ve really just had miserable luck and am just never in right environment to meet meet people (not only romantically, but platonically as well). It’s rather difficult to explain what I mean by this, but it’s defined been made worse by COVID. I have a number of odd personal issues problems as well that unfortunately kinda stuck me in a “loser” category. Nothing my outwardly apparent, but enough that anyone who knows me more than just superficially will be turned off. Some of it is my fault, some of it is due to things that were out of my control at the time, but require money / willpower to correct I just don’t have atm.

I would say that it hasn't been particularly successful/unsuccessful. Mostly because I've spent a lot of time convincing myself of various reasons why I shouldn't date. So if I don't make an effort, I can't really complain.

Feels like this question is difficult to answer in the moment? I was single for a long time and I enjoyed being single then I decided I didn't want to be alone and it was quite easy to find someone given how hard life usually is. I would say I've been successful but what if we don't get married? Or if we do what if we grow to resent each other decades down the line? I think given that I've been true and authentic in all my love affairs and been happy so far, that I have been successful but I need to work hard to make sure it stays that way.

Maybe I falls out of line here, but I met the love of my live in 11th grade. We got married this September, at our 12th anniversary. There is no secret, just the will to commit to the relationship, mutual support and talking about issues when they arise.

This is a rant, I don't want to explain why, I just want you to hear the product of my wrath. I cannot understand why people fail to think first about the will to love each other and then about the ability to subsist. To love someone means to be able to sacrifice oneself for the other, if you are not able to accept the risk of being with someone, in the last istance you are simply not able to love and therefore the intensity of your feelings will always be subdued by this inability. The only solution is to believe and be or to burn yourself even before starting.

Last year, I left the friendship zone with my current fiancée. Our wedding is in March. I'm happy.

Non-existent.