I think it could be worth exploring your spiritual beliefs. A couple years ago I decided to give this a shot and for about 6 months I actively explored questions like:

- Do I believe in god?

- Does the universe exist?

- What is my purpose in life?

I did not, and do not, have definitive answers but going through the rabbit holes trying to answer these questions have led me to adopting specific axioms which I use to help justify my place in this world.