As much as I despise social media and the effect it is having on the general population, after reading the (50-page) request and the dissent, this request by the FTC is completely bananas.

This is essentially how it reads:

"Foreach social media and streaming service, provide an audit of all electrons passing through or near the service. Account for the precise position & momentum of said particles, the method by which they are tracked, and the person or persons responsible for auditing bias of said electrons against members of the current political party. You have five days to complete the report."