this 2 'killer features' could be implemented in your tests in a day or two. Also, you can use video recording features implemented in docker images like Zalenium
In all seriousness, if that's true you should do it and productize it. Based on the comments here it seems like many people prefer other browser scripting tools, so if you can replicate the novel features of Cypress in a better package, you could make money. Cypress raised almost $10M in their Series A.
People have done this (even so far as completely replicating the Cypress Dashboard features):