You're misunderstanding Intel's specs. If you want the chip to run within TDP you can only expect the base frequency across all cores, not the ridiculous turbo frequency. The best laptop chip Intel has right now is the i9-10980HK with 8 cores at a 2.4GHz base frequency and a 45W TDP. Apple's laptops are more than capable of dissipating the rated TDP and hitting the base frequencies (and often quite a bit higher), although the fans can be a bit loud. So Apple's designs are not broken, at least not by Intel's definition.

You can relax the power limits and try to clock it closer to the 5.3GHz turbo frequency. But how much power do you need? I can't find numbers specifically for the i9-10980HK, but it seems like the desktop i9-9900K needs over 160 watts [1] to hit a mere 4.7GHz across all cores, measured at the CPU package (ie. not including VRM losses). Overall system power would be in excess of 200 watts, perhaps 300 watts with a GPU. Good luck cooling that in a laptop unless it's 2 inches thick or has fans that sound like a jet engine.

[1] https://www.anandtech.com/show/13400/intel-9th-gen-core-i9-9...