> Regardless of instrument, at a minimum you need to know your major and minor scales in every key, and arguably piano is easier in the sense you can transpose up and down octaves with the same shapes.
First of all, "Major" is "Ionian", and "Minor" is "Aeolian". Both are the same exact pattern of notes starting at a different point. This means that playing C Major (Ionian) involves the exact same set of notes as A Minor (Aeolian).
> C and Eb major look pretty different across a fret board, and if you want to shred, there is going to be a lot of scales in your practicing.
They look exactly the same. One is simply shifted 3 frets away from the next. That's my point. Playing Eb major in the same position as C major would involve changing shapes, and playing Eb major in the same shape as C major would involve changing position.
To contrast, playing Eb major in any position on a piano requires playing a totally different shape than C major. That means learning totally different muscle memory for Eb major, which is not necessary on guitar.
> Nothing is stopping you from becoming a virtuoso on something like an Ableton Push, but there just isn't any short cut around the practice and that's honestly the main slog.
There is nothing stopping me from becoming an expert on something like a Janko piano, except that I don't have one. I do have a piano. My point is that if I had both, I would find it much easier to learn the Janko piano, because it requires significantly less learning.
> 2 hand independence, internal sense of rhythm, syncopation, groove and understanding the relationships and functions of chords/harmony take tons of dedicated practice.
That's true. Factoring in different muscle memory for each individual key also requires tons of extra dedicated practice. That skill is totally unnecessary, and could be completely factored out by using a chromatic layout, allowing the learner to focus a significant amount more time and effort on those other skills you mentioned.
> To get where this is second nature just requires a lot of time. Issues with the keyboard's ergonomics are small in comparison.
Small? Arguable. Trivial? Definitely not.
> Theory is descriptive not prescriptive; it's how musicians can discuss what's happening in a piece.
Yes, and our current descriptors are convoluted. If we had better descriptors, we would be better equipped to discuss.
Frankly, they are prescriptive. They prescribe we call "loud" "forte", and "fast" "allegro". They prescribe that we call the 14th half-step up a "9th". The whole thing could use a complete overhaul, but professionalism demands we preserve antiquity.
> You will need to practice and learn some goofy names, but pretty much it's just a way to describe relative notes, groupings and relationships. Knowing your major and relative minors scales you can learn the other modes relatively easily; Mixolydian is a major scale with dominant 7th, Dorian is a minor scale with a major 6th.
You have illustrated my point well.