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Comment by princevegeta89 | Hacker News Reader

I lost my father recently and this has been the toughest period in my life. I grew up in India in a middle-class family and my father always went through unimaginable hardships just so that he can buy us chocolates and pay our tuition.

He was still young at 65 and there was so much that I wanted to see and share with him. Realizing that this is not ever going to happen itself kills me from the inside.

I'm doing okay now compared to a few weeks ago but I keep having breakdowns and depressing episodes every now and then.

I now know that I need to continue to live and be strong and do things for him and raise a family and spread love just like he did. I don't think I'll ever go back to living like before but I feel happy with the idea that I'll be taking it from here, keeping him in my thoughts every day, doing things he would do, talking and acting like he would, pass on his genes and finally go away like he did one day.

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I am sorry for your loss. I lost my father and my mother few years back. My mother’s passing away hit me very hard. My mother’s passing away meant I could no longer share my deepest feelings, fears and failings to someone who actually hears and understands. I still miss her. I now have kids and wish i had 1 percent the strength she had. I hope you find peace and are able to find strength from how your dad was a pillar in your family.

Really sorry to hear that. I can only imagine how losing both parents can feel. Thinking about it more, this is the cycle of life and everyone passes through this phase. This pain and burden makes no exception for anyone. Thinking back, I have developed even more respect for my father based on how he remained strong after losing his father who he loved to the end of the earth. He lost his mother a while ago as well, but he continued to stay strong, and he only continued living for us, his kids. We were his pillars and his strength. The best gift I can give him is to live and love like him, and pass on his ideas to my kids after they enter this world.

I'm really sorry to hear about your father.

My mom passed away in this pandemic too, and I don't know how the death of a parent is supposed to work, but it feels like it's impossible to offer them as much as they deserve. It's an odd sort of robbery of possibility :(

I am sorry to hear that. I'm not sure how to get through this either, but as everyone says, time is supposed to heal things.

I'm sorry for your loss.

Thank you

I lost my father some back too, though he lived longer, I can relate. Hit me up, my email is in my profile, would love to connect

Thank you for the support, it means a lot! I couldn't find your email though :/

Sorry, just added

That was beautiful.

Thank you. This was such a blow to me but I think everyone passes through this phase at some point. Even my father did when he lost his father. Based on my experience I can only say that this sort of pain is very personal and unique. I'm slowly coming to cope up with it.

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