Because the term is bullshit. I would be willing to read the phrase in a more charitable light if there was symmetry in these discussions associating negative female traits as toxic femininity. There is no symmetry. Negative feminine traits aren’t linked to gender. They are separated and abstracted from gender. The phrase toxic masculinity is used as to bludgeon masculine things and men.
It also goes against studies that show Young Men Who Endorse The Masculine Ideal of Success Enjoy Greater Psychological Wellbeing[1]
"The findings are mixed, but given the recent cultural emphasis on toxic masculinity, one result stands out: young men who, on the “Conformity to Masculine Norms” scale, more strongly endorsed the masculine ideal of “success and winning” (they agreed with statements like “In general, I will do anything to win”), tended to score higher on psychological wellbeing six months later. “Men who adhere to this norm may experience a sense of mastery and achievement through their accomplishments,” said the researchers, led by Aylin Kaya at the University of Maryland, “which can in turn boost their eudaemonic well-being.”"
Not only is the belief in a code of “true manliness” nearly universal, there are, as anthropologist Thomas Gregor puts it, “continuities of masculinity that transcend cultural differences.” While every society’s idea of what constitutes a “real man” has been molded by their unique histories, environments, and dominant religious beliefs, Gilmore found that almost all them share three common imperatives or moral injunctions — what I’ve taken to calling the 3 P’s of Manhood: a male who aspires to be a man must protect, procreate, and provide.
What is so striking is that this triad of male imperatives can be found in cultures that share little else in common. They are the “deep structures of masculinity” and are present in societies that are patriarchal as well as those that are relatively egalitarian, primitive as well as urban, bellicose as well as peaceable.
The 3 P’s are not universal, as there are a few cultures where no ideal of manhood exists at all. But these exceptions are so rare, and so, well, exceptional, that the code is, if not universal, than highly ubiquitous.
From https://www.artofmanliness.com/articles/the-3-ps-of-manhood-...
These are positive traits, it is hard to see what is so toxic about them, and therefore the phrase toxic masculinity feels like it is just attacking men for being men.
Collectively, all this toxic masculinity talk and feminising of the world has done is created an entire generation who cannot solve their own problems. Any problem they have they run off to an authority figure to resolve. You constantly read about stories like this:
Billy said something I found offensive. Kelly didn't like it. She didn't explain any of this to billy, instead she ran off to the Dean to complain.
[1]
https://digest.bps.org.uk/2019/01/18/young-men-who-endorse-t...