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The only reason this seems at all useful would be to take advantage of cheap shared hosting that can only run php. But that's hardly a good reason given that you can run a ruby (rack-based) app on heroku for free!

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I've had consulting gigs where I was forced to write PHP apps because of management decisions. Something like this would have been helpful.

I'm guessing that your clients wouldn't be pleased with the PHP the compiler produces. It wouldn't really be maintainable PHP code for them.

Just tell them it's really good PHP.

There's a Poe's Law joke buried here somewhere.

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