For me, wearing a tie is about beautiful symmetry: when the tie is exactly centered with a neat knoth, a series of elegant angles are created under the wearer's face. There is something very architectural about that.

By the way, a women wearing a neck tie to complete her business suit can be very attractive for me (a powerful encroachment on "male" attire), so the tie really can be universal.

I really don't understand the angst. Wear whatever the hell you want.