In Ashgabat | Hacker News Reader

In Ashgabat

lrb.co.uk

73 pointsflannery13 comments

The easiest way to experience Turkmenistan is to go on the Mongol Rally. They work with a visa company to give all the participants a letter of invitation, which is valid for two months, for a five-day transit without a guide.

Some facts that I found funny at the moment: - they gave us a GPS device at the border to keep plugged in so they could track us. We just threw it in the back because our old crappy car didn't have a lighter. They didn't check the data when we left the country. - they had a bank rate for exchange and a black market rate. The black market rate was 1 USD for 16 something and the bank rate was 1 USD for 3 something of the local currency. You could pay in USD, of course getting ripped at the bank rate. We managed to change some money on the street. - a room at a normal hotel costs more than 80 USD, we found something similar to a hostel for 15 USD and still went to the Grand Turkmen, acted like we stayed there and stole some Internet - a SIM card with 1 GiB of Internet was around 40 USD, we passed - the Internet goes through an IPS that blocks everything we use in the western world: FB, Gmail, Whatsapp, VPNs etc. I had to tunnel through an SSH server listening on port 443 just to be able to send an email. Images didn't work, because the connection closed (I think they were cutting connections based on sequence numbers or something) - you couldn't take any photos, they checked our mobiles upon leaving the country. Funny, because Ashgabat was beautiful and it's in the Guiness Book for the most marble and for the most waterfalls - whenever we were alone, it took only 10 minutes tops for someone with a walkie-talkie to pass next to us - they removed all people from a whole boulevard to make room for some official hotshot to pass - we were listening to music in the car with the windows lowered and I later read that it was illegal. Maybe that's why everyone was staring at us - beer was available at almost any place - we slept at Darvaza, "the gates of hell" one night. The next day we headed north and ran out of water. - we had some work performed on our car and the mechanics were very friendly

All in all, it was a fantastic experience and I would totally do it again.

You might know another HN'er, Luuseens: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=23906046

> we were listening to music in the car with the windows lowered and I later read that it was illegal.

In turkmenistan, I think if you want to pump that bass, you're supposed to do it off your horse — no windows whatsoever: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Zo-YE2Ori0&t=10

(I wonder if the turkmen play https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kyz_kuu ? As I understand it, the catch is that traditionally the guy has to give the girl his best horse, so two viable strategies are (a) impress her enough beforehand that she doesn't go full out, or (b) have at least two very fast horses in one's stable.)

Sounds like an adventure!

Unfortunately my team didn't end up visiting when I participated in the rally, but every team who wanted to go to Turkmenistan had to advertise some horse show that was running in the country that summer. They made everyone slap a rather large sticker with the logo on their car. I wonder if the campaign was considered successful considering most people outside of the country weren't able to attend or watch it anyway :)

Turkmenistan is a really interesting place to visit. I entered from the north on foot and caught a ride in a weird hippy van taxi instead of the 1km walk between the border checkpoints of Turkmenistan and Uzbekistan. If you are interested in atypical travel I definitely can recommend it.

Interesting doesn't even begin to cover Ashgabat. It is positively surreal. It looks as if somebody was playing Sim City in cheat mode.

And getting through the beaurocracy, crossing the border by car was very much akin to https://youtu.be/JtEkUmYecnk?t=33

After that, finding out that the whole district your hotel was supposed to be in has been demolished just a few weeks prior isn't as surprising as one would think.

how did you exit?

Did you go yourself or use an agency? I was in Uzbekistan last year and from what I gathered, Turkmenistan isn't a place you can really do much solo travel.

I managed to finally get a LoI approval this year after 2 previous rejections but then COVID happened; I'm hoping it's an easier process when I reapply next year (assuming they've reopened to tourists).

Note to anyone curious and reading: if you have a US passport - this is a challenging country to get into. Plan ahead and be prepared to either book flights last minute pending approval or buy refundable tickets for when you get the rejection last minute.

For flavour, if travel is difficult[1], at least Youtubing is easy.

Here's a turkmen wedding: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BGhSBOy8H_Y

and a pop clip: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=udALVHSH9T4 (According to WP and the picture on https://yashlar.gov.tm/catalog/556 , this song is named after the "red rover" game.)

or landscapes + folkloric activities: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uy8LOpoMh10

Akhal-Tekes clean up fancy? https://live.staticflickr.com/5560/14529754743_26a80692e0_b....

[1] "Восток — дело тонкое"

(the obvious incentivisation is that oil companies need to hire country managers who are wealthy enough on their own account they can assume any necessary irregular payments and entertainment will be arranged by their personal lawyers, or in any case, well off the companies' own books?)

Incidentally, Berdimuhamedow's thesis was "Clinical features and pathogenesis of major dental diseases in children of multiparous women", but I haven't bothered to look up his advisor.

Do not go there, lest you want to add to ranks of Otto Warmbiers.

Turkmenistan, up until recently, was a close contender for the title of Central Asian version of North Korea with Uzbekistan.

With Karimov now dead, his gang purged, and Uzbekistan coming to a minimal semblance of normality, Turkmenistan takes the title.

Not sure why you were downvoted. These two countries have incredibly brutal dictatorships - far worse than countries we usually criticize (Iran, etc). I'm more familiar with Uzbekistan, where a decade ago there were a number of cases of people dying in prison because of burns from boiling water being thrown on them. Islam is practically outlawed - people have been put in prison for sporting a religious beard. When I was in grad school, there was an Uzbek student who was friends with a local Muslim student. When he was returning to Uzbekistan, he told his friend never to use Islamic phrases (greetings, etc) in emails to him as those could land him in prison.

Very controlling of outside journalists. Almost no outside journalist was allowed on site to report on the Andijan massacre, for example.[1]

I recall when Ahmadinejad came to Columbia to speak, the university president (Bollinger) went out of his way to blast him for his policies. Yet just the day before the Turkmenistan president spoke, and Bollinger also opened for his speech, and praised him. I was aghast.

Wiki page on human rights in these countries: [2] [3]. Turkmenistan even banned libraries outside of the capital. And video games!

[1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2005_Andijan_unrest

[2] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_rights_in_Uzbekistan

[3] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_rights_in_Turkmenistan

https://archive.is/OpUaO

I seem to remember there are or were a few more of these, all making for fascinating reading. But I'm having trouble finding them again, possibly due to the intentional detail fuzzing. Leads or links would be appreciated if anyone has them....

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