I think the problem is that HTTP reverse proxies do so much, it's hard to specify what Kubernetes should do and what you should get an external solution to do. (Personally I am appalled at how org-wide SSO works right now, and almost started my own company to sell an open-source solution to the problem. But... I don't know how to start a company and then there was a pandemic. Someone else will sell you a not-as-good solution for mega-bucks.)
In my opinion, people are always going to want their special thing; compatibility with their legacy nginx.conf, support for HTTP/3, whatever. Kubernetes can never satisfy people with those requirements. For that reason, I think people need to agree on a service discovery protocol, a route discovery protocol, and then hook those into their frontend proxy of choice. For example, I never really liked Ingress (lots of unspecified landmines, like what order rules are evaluated in when matching a request to a route), and so just run Envoy inside Kubernetes. Envoy is then fed a static route table and a valid TLS certificate, and handles all traffic in an explicit and easy to debug way. I wrote something to glue Envoy's service discovery to Kubernetes so my static config file contains less boilerplate (https://github.com/jrockway/ekglue), and it's served me well. (I need to write something to add route table entries to DNS, though. I currently do that by editing my DNS records in a web interface, which is tedious and uninteresting.)
With that in mind, what people should really be focusing on is standardizing xDS (Envoy's config language basically), and hooking it into their container orchestration framework and web server of choice. Then you can run Nginx on Openshift or Apache on ECS and everyone is using the same tools to do the very boring gruntwork of figuring out what your backends are called, and what syntax you use to say "send all requests that match example.com/foobar to a backend my container orchestration framework calls foo-bar-v2". I am sure it will sort itself out eventually -- xDS has a lot of momentum in things that aren't Envoy (notably gRPC), so this could all be a solved problem outside of Kubernetes soon enough.