Gotta appreciate the part implying that anyone who finds this document amusing is a "novice" programmer.
The original reasons listed by Deno for removing TS had the undertones of "senior engineer who hates certain tech because they didn't use it right". Naturally, their response was to say "you probably don't understand cause you're a novice".
But I don’t think I’d ever want to go back to plain Javascript.
Guess a combination of esbuild during development, and tsc during commit would be the best of both worlds.