So, serious question: if I was going to buy a ring for my girlfriend, would this be a good time to buy?
This helpful link explains what and why
It just represents way too much in their heads.
For what's worth my girlfriend already made it clear that she would be very upset if I ever bought her such expensive jewellery, precisely because of lost opportunity cost in things like enjoyable trips through Europe, attending concerts/plays and that sort of actually meaningful experiences. So hey, there goes your theory?
“Bold statement to make about 3,500,000,000 people”
Wow... you must have very busy tinder profile. :D
I’d love to be able to convince her that the ring money would do great in a Vanguard fund instead :p.
Edit: Looks like I have to put this disclaimer, for many people the things I listed above are milestones (not for all).
Some will hear nothing more than 'not a diamond', and some will say 'you wasted how much'.
What're you going to do, if you're even thinking about it you're obviously set on her, so it only matters how she feels about them to the extent that you know!
Well, if one person makes a blanket statement about all individuals in a group, and the other disproves that with a single individual to which the statement does not apply, one of them clearly is more right than the other.
I don't have any statistics, but it seems obvious the group of women desiring diamonds is bigger (to say the least) than the group of women not interested by them.
Without generalization there can be no reasoning, because you can always find outliers that disprove any claim.
So no, (1) you don't have any data, to even say "most" women do, and (2) that's not what the guy I replied to said, he said "all" women.
Suggested spending guideline: if you’re well off, spend about what you would on what you’d consider to be a great but not ridiculous gaming rig on her engagement present, and make sure she wouldn’t rather have a great gaming rig, sewing machine, musical instrument, etc. than a ring.
Addendum: I was later upset when he sold all his stocks during the 2008 crash because he thought he’d need the cash for our wedding - the wedding my parents were happily paying for, because Texas. A little more communication on both our parts would have prevented that loss.
Deciding to get married is wonderful. Congratulations! But sometimes people have a mental image of the sitcom scene where the one partner astounds the other by suddenly getting on one knee and plunking $30K on their hand. On reflection, that may not be the right way for people to start their life together, is all I'm saying.
Some other friendly tips: you can secretly measure your partner’s finger size to get the perfect ring without them suspecting.
Going through the effort of getting the ring and sizing it properly without them suspecting shows how much you care and will yield you a better outcome than discussing this matter directly with them ;)
Edit: this is obviously with the assumption that you’ve at decided to get married. The surprise is about the ring not the marriage.
It can be a romantic outing in and of itself. I took my wife ring shopping to a half dozen stores in a beautiful fall afternoon. We didn't but anything, that was never the plan. I just wanted to see what rings made her face light up, then I made a much cheaper purchase on my own time.
It seems to be best if both partners have discussed and agreed on marriage prior to the actual proposal, and it would then make sense to also have discussed the kind of ring (or price class of ring at least) that they would want.
Exactly what ring you get can be a surprise of course, but I think the price tag should be somewhat known beforehand.
If by "you" you mean me, I've been married since 86. (I understand that you may have meant a generic "you.")
FWIW, we didn't buy a ring. I can't say we took that money and put it to use X but in the first years of marriage we certainly had some months where we were only able to pay bills by looking under the couch cushions for quarters, so I think it was a sound direction, for us.
Looking for the stone together was entertaining after I was able to get him to understand that I really, really didn’t expect him to spend the “two months' salary” that is “customary” in my home country (USA).
If you want the romantic surprise, arrange a nice, private dinner (or other private special occasion) and get a silver CZ ring to present as a placeholder for the ring she’s going to help you pick out, making it clear that it’s a placeholder. If this does not go over well, better to find this out about her before making a big legal commitment!
A true life partner will want to choose their own ring, and in particular, will want to think rationally about all of the other things you could do together with that money.
After proposing, you have several options:
* If she wants a diamond or moissanite or CZ or other ring, the two of you can go shopping for it later, or commission a custom one.
* If she doesn't want an expensive ring, you can spend it on other things.
* If she gets extremely upset and refuses just because you should have gotten a diamond ring the first time, you might want to rethink whether you want to spend your life with this person.
I say this as someone who likes the idea of moissanite, but relented to getting an "ethical" diamond from Canada (there is some dispute about provenance of these diamonds).
In other words, this isn't a hill to die on.
I would instead look at Moissanite[0]; looks better, holds it's value a little bit better although debeers has killed a second hand market for this kind of jewellry..