Ask HN: Working from home & depression | Hacker News Reader

Ask HN: Working from home & depression

25 pointsnewgirl19 comments

I have been working from home for 2.5 months with no option to go into an office for social interaction. I noticed in the first month I was starting to get cagey so I joined a gym to go to evening classed and moved my evening piano lessons to lunch time to get outside for a break once a week. I also try walking to the local gas station for any trivial treat or newspaper...But I feel that over the last few weeks my moods have been really affected by working and living in the same 1200 sqft. How else can I change my schedule to avoid the loneliness of working from home and the familarity of living in your work area at night/weekends.

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I've also recently started working from (a temporary) home. A couple of remarks:

- develop a good routine that keeps you moving. For me, it means:

  - working from home from 9 to 12. 

  - eat lunch at home

  - go to coffee shop to have coffee/work from there until 6

  - stop working at 6 and do something else: sports, meet with friends etc.

- big space/natural light is very important. Right now I'm in a tiny hotel room with no windows and I simply cannot work from there. So I'm all day in a coffee shop (in a new town, so no getting bored feeling yet).

- Talk to other people about what you're doing (significant other, friends, etc) Try to explain progress you've made today. It can get pretty frustrating if you're spinning your wheels all day without nobody to talk about it.

- If your work (and your finances) allows it, go somewhere else where you can stay for a week (friend or family place). I'm currently traveling in South-East Asia and it helps not to be locked in the same room all the time.

- Get out and join classes. You're already doing it with gym classes, but maybe you could try something else if you don't like it.

I agree with all the above. I eventually figured out why people work at Starbucks. Be nomadic. I've been exploring the idea of "hacking field trips": taking a train somewhere (which itself I've heard works) and staying with a friend to spend the downtime with.

On a related note, when I was a teenager, I was diagnosed with ADD (no H) but was not told. Instead of medication, my parents took me to a behaviorist who insisted I always "get ready" for tasks that required focus. Even if it was the weekend and I was at home, I should take a shower, get dressed, and "splash on some cologne" before I even attempted to do my homework. He was real big on natural light too. In my case alertness and depression never seem to coincide.

Library, Starbucks, Co-Working facilities, if they have them in your area. Working from home is not for everyone - if it isn't working for you, change jobs. I would suggest that 2.5 months is enough time to determine if this type of arrangement works for you or not - but maybe it will take a little longer.

Agree. I work from home and prefer it but I can definitely see how it might not be suitable for everyone. My friend worked from home for a year and he remarks that he could only do max 6 hours of work per day. It's surprising to find out just how much those office distractions eat out of a day and when you work from home, you no longer have them.

You may want to see about trying to shorten your work day.

I love working at home. I can concentrate so much better than in the office, where I get distracted all the time. Office is great for meetings and discussions, but when those are over and I really need to get things done, I work better at home.

Then again, I've always been pretty comfortable with internet-based communication, so I don't tend to get lonely at all.

Also, working at home doesn't mean sitting in the same place all the time for me. I sometimes go to the park, or other places, for some change of scenery.

I've had a similar problem after working for 10 months for a company in Scotland (from Vancouver). Unfortunately, I didn't have any co-working/café/library options because for security reasons I had to be connecting from my static (home) IP address. It didn't help that because of my coverage time, I needed to be at home on weekends and during the evenings - all the times that my friends were available. Basically 10 months without a social life.

On top of that, I never had the feeling that I could 'go home' and relax. I was always at home, so I could always work, so no matter what I was doing (reading, web browsing, watching TV) I always felt like I should be working instead. This ended up carrying over to other activities, even when I was out in the mornings before my shift, and I ended up feeling constantly guilty for not being as productive as I could have been, which led to me feeling more and more depressed and being even less productive. It became a reckless downward spiral that I just couldn't deal with.

In the end, I took a pay cut ($20k loss in take-home) to start at a local company so that I could shake the depression I was dealing with and stop being so squirrely. Some people can do working from home, and some jobs are worth doing from home, but personally I couldn't deal with it.

I went through a similar thing as a one man startup (also in Vancouver). Like you, I've come to realize I simply can't do it.

The funny thing is that people often think you're living the dream by working from home. After all, you can work in your underwear if you want to! Indeed, I thought I had it pretty good and couldn't understand why I was so unhappy all the time.

It's my opinion that people who can work from home for long periods of time and maintain a healthy mental and physical state are the exception and not the rule.

Definitely true. I found that after a few weeks, I was waking up, stumbling out of bed, sitting in my chair, and taking a look at what was going on. After a few months, I realized that I felt awful every day, because I'd gone from bed to work without any break in between, and it was getting close to 4 PM before I was showering and having breakfast.

Enforcing an actual schedule on yourself makes a significant difference, and it's the only reason I managed to keep myself sane as long as I did.

I started working from home 4 months ago and have noticed the same thing to some degree. For the first time in my life I have though it would be nice to not live alone so its not so isolating.

I love being able to focus at home in a way that I never could in previous work environments so I don't want to give it up. My suggestion is to move into a larger place if you can afford it. I'd go crazy being stuck in the same 1200ft all the time. Right before I started telecommuting I moved from a 2 bedroom apartment to a 4 bedroom house (and then some.) This gives me a dedicated work area that I can get away from in the off time. The other thing I do is get out of the house for lunch almost every day, usually with friends.

I think its normal to feel this way, but you're obviously aware of it and you can find a way to cope.

I've had the same issue - couldn't get work done and couldn't relax. My solution was to cancel my home internet plan and go to the library. No more working at home for me. :)

Plus, it saves me ~$50/month, which helps when you're bootstrapping a business.

I've worked at home for getting close to 1.5 years now. I sometimes want to kick people who say they are jealous. In the end I would have a tough time going back to an office setting unless forced to. It takes discipline to not grab one of the guitars behind me, or run to the living room and play some PS3 since no one is watching.

Two things that have helped me are my windows and dogs. I work in the front corner of my house, I've positioned my desk so that I look out the front windows. I live on a somewhat busy street so it helps to see things moving outside. Then my dogs, they are pretty routine with their breaks. I'll take them out in the backyard and throw the tennis ball with them, this keeps me from thinking about work for a little bit. I also make sure to grab lunch with my coworkers once a week, plus my wife can tell when I've been 'locked up' too long so she will take me out.

As danudey said you always have this feeling like you should be working all the time. I work a LOT more now that I work at home. It's very tough to sometimes just go to the computer and check out the news on the weekend without wanting to tinker on work. The guilty feeling comes and goes when you have really productive days.

It probably helps a lot that I am married to force me to stick to a schedule and it will keep work as work and home as home. I also have a kid on the way, but it will present the challenge of now working at home with a wife and kid. Depending on how well it works or not I might move to a co-working facility in town.

This is exactly the reason I started playing Rejection Therapy. It challenged me to get out of the house and have a meaningful (exciting even) interaction with another human being.

Just take a card (or make up your own challenge) and that will be your mission for the day. Trust me, it's fun and it's a way to meet new people.

Oh yeah, and consider taking an anti- depressant, even if it's for the short term.

If you know others who work from home, invite them over to work at your place.

Here are my thoughts from experience:

1. keep a schedule-be showered, have breakfast and be ready to work at 9. 2. I have friend I call at lunchtime so that I'm not eating "alone" 3. When it seems like nothing is getting done, I go and have a change of place...I go to Starbucks, the library or somewhere else to complete the work. 4. Find a group of other friends that also work from home and have phone/skype/im coffee breaks with one or two of them. 5. Let yourself be lazy sometimes-no one is productive every day. Hope that helps!

I find the quality of light to be a big factor for me. Sitting in front of a big window, or heading to a coffee shop and sitting right next to one of their big picture windows helps a lot.

Even if most of your friends are working, you can set up short lunch dates to catch up and get some people time.

Where are you located? I've wrestled with this in the past as well. Finding a co-working spot can be a huge help. I was lucky enough to get Pivotal Labs to host me as I work on my startup and it's made a huge difference.

I work from home and I admit it's not easy sometimes.

But..

1. I have a dog which forces me to go out.

2. I also live in an urban setting which means I am forced to interact with people when I go out.

This is totally normal and understandable. Even the days I work from home, I usually feel like going to the office by noon.

As other people have suggested, try going to a place where you can still work. Maybe ask people at your office to set up a webcam/mic for you(maybe a netbook in the office kitchen?, might get interesting for both them and you!), or during meetings.

If not then think about getting a job where you can go work in an office. Depression can be serious business, do not neglect it, it's not worth it.

I just want to reiterate what was said above: "Depression can be serious business, do not neglect it, it's not worth it."

Some people simply cannot work/live alone for long periods. I tried it for years myself, but was completely miserable and have since changed my life.

Having said that, little things that may (or may not) help you are: having a workspace with tons of natural light, morning exercise and having a strict and balanced schedule of work/play/sleep. Good luck.

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