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Comment by onemoresoop | Hacker News Reader

This is spot on. I am horified at what my kids will learn as normal from watching porn when they later get access to it. There is so much garbage out there that is pushing the notion of normality that they will be utterly confused. Im not a prude either but I find “deepthroat” as utterly disgusting, someone is chocking and gagging and makes me vomit. And yet, Ive seen girls who learned to enjoy it because that makes them normal to their peers while they secretly don’t like choking or gagging. This is just one example, there are way more. Im so happy I grew up and former with less access to porn.

I really dont know what the solution can be for this other than curating what types of videos they could watch. Some of the stuff is dangerous too

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OMG :)

violencedeathmurderbloodpainhurtkillkillkill...

"Oh but wat about oral sex, it is teh dangerous!"

I love you Americans to bits but sometimes you really are just too bloody weird. I give up.

There's a difference between "oral sex" and forcing someone to choke on a penis.

But you know that. Or, at the very least, you should.

Address the argument made, not the one you wanted them to make.

You're quite right. Thanks for pointing it out. Upvoted.

OK, here's what he said "but I find “deepthroat” as utterly disgusting".

There's no space for the fact that some women like that, or that even if they don't, adult film workers are doing a paid job. Not all oral sex involves choking or apparently being forced. But that's a blanket condemnation based on him being "disgusted" and ignoring the nonsexual violence in mainstream media.

He goes on "I really dont know what the solution can be for this other than curating what types of videos they could watch"

So back to curating sex videos but ignoring extreme graphic nonsexual violence?

This discussion doesnt exclude violence but we are focusing on the topic at hand.

Second, I dont know if you notice but people copy any type of behaviour that is seen more, the type of thing becomes normalized, and as an example was the deepthroat that women can’t possibly enjoy, but do it anyway because it somehow becomes expected of them to do so, some even start enjoying the act even though it is not pleasant, it’s a coping mechanism...

Violence on TV is obviously affecting our society for sure, and violence suffered from the same capitalistic fault to maximize profit, violence initially sold well so it produced exponentially more until the last dime could be extracted out of it.

If no financial incentive is behind any of these “memes” then maybe the better ones become normalized and the effects on society are less nocive. Speaking broadly ofc.

> people copy any type of behaviour that is seen more, the type of thing becomes normalized

Yeah. Like extraordinary levels of violence on TV that the audience becomes accustomed to it and simply don't see it any more whereas porn...

> as an example was the deepthroat that women can’t possibly enjoy

Wut really? Hint: women are people and some like different things, including that, unforced. You've really never met...? This smacks of the old view that women couldn't possibly enjoy sex and it was forced upon them unwillingly by those horrid beastly men.

In you penultimate sentence you appear to be accepting media violence as a given. So fight back.

Your last sentence I cannot understand.

You seem to not want to understand on purpose and keep on telling me I take violence on TV for granted. I am not, I told you already, we’re talking about porn.

Women feel lesser if they do not perform certain things that are in fashion, some kind of peer pressure. Who sets that fashion? Who is sick to want a women choke and gag on a man’s penis? You enjoy vomit? I dont think it has a place in healthy sexuality.

And let me explain what I mean in the last paragraph of my previous comment: the extreme commercialization typical of capitalism is responsible for amplifying these memes, normalizing new things that are degrading for some and hence exploitative in nature. What are you fighting back about? Are you just a contrarian?

> Women feel...

I do not wish to continue this. Congratulations on successfully weirding me out with your interpretation of oral sex.

You’re the deepthroat defender, I don’t know who’s weirder. I continued this out of politeness by the way, I don’t find you very worthy of conversation, I just thought I would open an idiot’s eyes

I'm curious what's your opinion on "dudes" that are doing deepthroat ?

Are they also forced to do it ?!

(or maybe they genuinely enjoy it)

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