After taxes, health care and Solidaritätszuschlag, your taxrate for 100k ist closer to 42% in Germany
I used mostly default values in the first online calculators I found for both California & Germany in the example in my original post.
My personal tax rate is even lower than that as we have 2 kids & my wife and I file together (both self employed so we add up our incomes and file with all tax bracket at double the threshold). I think we ended up paying just over 15% off the top of my head but don't quote me on that (I earn less than €92k but still enough to have a very comfortable life).
I knew you pay more as a single/childless person but I didn't realize just how much more - which makes it all the more surprising that Germans have such a low rate of both marriage and reproduction.