Oh man, Ancillary Justice by Ann Leckie is AMAZING on so many levels.
A common thread with these books seems to be exploring consciousness and definitions of self.
As a bonus it does stuff I find more from women authors, like quietly question gender roles without making a scene about it, question slavery, ownership, etc.
Similar a bit to the Murderbot Diaries by Martha Wells but on a whole other level.
Its a wonderful trilogy of three books. Strongly recommend it.
I can also recommend N.K. Jemisin, not really mind bending, but very odd
Generally I dislike it when authors patronise me, banging my head against their genius, and I find women authors tend to do that less (Disclaimer to sensitive people : this is my personal opinion)