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"Well, it's not a problem for me..."

I'm in Boston, and AFAIK there's nowhere I can get a test without having severe symptoms that require hospitalization.

Work for a hospital system in Boston and can confirm - testing guidelines here remain quite strict.

I donated blood at MGH yesterday, which is how I checked. I'm just hoping to I don't fall down ill in two weeks' time from having set foot, even masked and hand-sanitized, in a hospital.

I know multiple people personally who called in experiencing COVID symptoms and were told to not even come to the hospital. If you aren't above a certain age or don't have preexisting conditions, they're likely not going to test you.

I had symptoms, and had even been traveling in Europe, but since I'm not elderly and haven't recently been to China, no test for you. Stay home and get bed rest. OK, I guess we're still pretending you only get it from China? This is a major health care provider in the Bay Area. Still coughing after 3 weeks...