Ask HN: Do you tend to think you are right? | Hacker News Reader

Ask HN: Do you tend to think you are right?

1 pointandrewstuart11 comments

In any given situation, do you have a tendency to think that your opinion is right? Or are you wary of yourself, do you think "I don't trust my instincts, I might be wrong". Do you often change your mind based on what others say to you?

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I don't react the same way in any situation. In situations where I know I'm an expert, I trust my instincts. In areas where I'm not expert - perhaps just a novice, I tend to change my mind based on what others may say or things I learn/research on my own.

Isn't that how everyone does it?

I suspect many people think they are right - all the time, about everything - very hard to get the to change their minds. Do you have a partner/wife/husband? Do you tend to think you are right in relation to discussion that you have with them, or are you constantly open to change of mind?

Married, yes. My wife's changed my mind on some things, sometimes easily, sometimes not, and sometimes I don't budge. Again... if it's something I know a lot about, I tend to think I'm right (and usually am), but sometimes I'm wrong, and I adjust.

My certainty about things varies all over the place. Everybody's does.

However: no matter how right I think I am about something, I can almost always dispassionately consider a counterargument. And when that happens, the only way to lose the argument is to start out wrong and stay wrong. Being right to begin with: victory! Being wrong initially, but then changing your mind to become right: victory! You can win an argument by "losing" it. This makes changing my mind pretty much painless, which is nice. It's definitely easier than tying my ego to my supposed inerrancy.

This state of mind took a lot of practice over the course of several years to achieve, and I'm still far from perfect here, but it's definitely worth the trouble.

One major difference between the 20 year old me and the almost-30 year old me is that I used to assume everyone else was more experienced and more knowledgable. Truth is, they usually were!

But now, I've seen significant character flaws in the most seemingly confident of people. I know how fragile, stubborn, and downright wrong people can be. Even en masse. So while I still second guess myself, I now have the confidence to forge ahead with something that feels right to me knowing that I'm not necessarily wrong.

I'm the inverse. The young me was overly confident and thought I was right about most things. The older I get, the more willing I am to accept I might be wrong about just about anything.

I usually go into things having thought them through and after doing research so I am usually pretty confident that I am right.

That being said, I am always open to other ideas and listening. If I am proven wrong I am more than willing to accept that.

I tend to be very objective rather than believe I'm right or wrong on any given subject. In areas where I have strong expertise, I tend to be more opinionated but I still retain the openness when discussing.

It's better to admit you're wrong and proven right than to admit you're right and proven wrong. This is how I feel when someone tell me they found a bug in my code.

I'm ALWAYS right ;-)

...and the downvote clearly demonstrates the fallacy in such a statement!

It's rather like the paradox in saying: 'I ALWAYS lie'...

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