Ask HN: What would you do? Release or Polish more

I am working on a project that I've been thinking about for a few months. I finally got off my butt and started coding it up. My time is limited, as I have full-time job and big family. I'm giving it all I have, but I need sleep and just not enough hours in the day! :-) I need your advice.

My product is scratching an itch that I have. The challenge is that I think it's scratching an itch that a lot of other people have too, because every day I see announcements on here from other people launching things trying to solve the problem – albeit via a different approach. To date, I haven't seen any of them with the features that I think will set my site apart and really get some traction. But I'm also aware that unique ideas are not so unique. I dread the day I read ShowHN with something that is nearly identical to what I'm doing. The particular feature that sets my solution apart is one that isn't developed yet – as it relies on other features to be completed before it can be implemented.

Further, I'm not a designer. So my site is completely minimalistic. I have two images only! :-) It makes HN look pretty! Actually, I think HN is pretty in its simplicity, but was trying to get a point across – my site is very basic and not like the visually cool things I see launched regularly.

My questions:

1.Should I release w/o the killer feature that I think will set it apart - to at least get some initial traction and feedback? I could describe it, and mock it up, without real functionality behind it. Or would this be a bad move – in that someone with more time can implement it quicker than me? I know I shouldn't worry about copy-cats – but I don't want someone to copy an idea that isn't even working yet!

2.Should I release w/o a visually nice design? The eye candy factor is important and I don't know if my minimalistic site will deter people because it isn't pretty. I'm no PG – and don't know the tolerance level people would have for a site that isn't backed by such a popular group of people.

3.I'm completely bootstrapped, and I would like to remain that way. However, I don't have extra income to pay a designer – so should I give up part of it for design help? If so, how much?

4.Release Early | Release Often – a principle I understand. But how early is too early?

I look forward to benefiting from your collective wisdom. Thank you.