As people here suggest I would try finding any kind of low income job first. For what it takes.

Than when you sort things out and have stable living situation (have place to live and food to eat) you can get back to tech - start attending meetups and maybe try applying jobs via this personal contacts.

I don't know how churches work in Netherlands, in Poland you would get some help - it really depends from people. If you won't reach out for help, you won't get it.