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Also worth keeping in mind: Every other launch system out there "Fails" to recover their first stage on every single launch. SpaceX "Failing" here is reverting to norm.

Not quite, they re-flew this particular booster 3 times after the initial launch. Reverting to the norm would be a crash after the first flight. Makes you wonder what the maximum life expectancy is for these boosters.

Also:

1) This was this particular booster's 4th flight

2) This particular orbit was stated to be at the very edge of F9's performance.

Success is measured by cost too... How much money is saved by recovering the booster?

Trying to recover the first stage significantly reduces available payload.

That's probably not significant for Starlink specifically, as they're constrained by fairing volume rather than maximum payload mass (which is to say: even if they weren't recovering the booster, they wouldn't be able to increase the number of satellites).