According to the fine print, you need to keep a balance of $10,000 to get that 2.25% rate. There have been points in my life when I've had that much money in the bank, but this is not one of them.
Best I can get in an immediate access bank account here is 1.35%. Cash is 0%. I can't pay rent and bills with anything else that I'm aware of.
IE, Is there a way that doesn't result in someone 'basically stealing [my] money', or am I screwed no matter what?