Ha, same. Is how to win friends and influence people the one you haven't read?
"If you want to learn what people want, read Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People. When a friend recommended this book, I couldn't believe he was serious. But he insisted it was good, so I read it, and he was right. It deals with the most difficult problem in human experience: how to see things from other people's point of view, instead of thinking only of yourself."{1}
I have huge respect for Graham and began to read it based on his recommendation, but gave up about half way. It's so tedious, repetitive, and obvious that I genuinely can't understand what people see in it.
I think that can be said for a lot of books that are popular. It's a bit like applied math vs. pure math. In pure math, applied math is often seen as a "natural consequence". And yet, applied math is what most people view as useful and moreover, pure mathematicians often don't know how to apply mathematics to engineering or physics. Personally, I agree with you, but I think that what is obvious is not always precise, and what is precise is sometimes not used.
I have a sort of moral objection to these kind of books too, but somehow you can both see these books as a sort of moral "cheating" and you can see these books as a useful way to better you relationships with other people (and both viewpoints have merit). I didn't read How to Win Friends and Influence People, but my comment is based on my experience with trying to read *What they don't teach you at Harvard Business School." [1]
[1] By Mark H. McCormack.
same! but i finished it anyway. it was during my speed-reading / audiobook transition. i have now become a normal reader again :)
to your point though, in retrospect, i think it all depends on when in your life/career you read a recommended book. seems to me that by the time you got to how to win friends, you have already read a lot and learned most of the "obvious" things in the book.