If you have kids that want to do things in a pretty non-conformant way (with beautiful irony) I'd recommend taking a look at VMI and The Citadel, neither requires military service afterward (although it is an option and a good one to pay for the experience) yet you will be along side some of the best current and future military leaders as teachers, classmates, and friends for life. The Federal service academies are also well regarded but there's something a little bit more rough and tumble at these two that is precious and I say that with respect even as they two are rivals.

To have you ass kicked every day, in every way imaginable (mentally, physically, athletically, motivational, trivially, lack of sleep and food, academically) while still doing a full course load is really a great start on adult life which can be just as hard and you are always prepared. I doubt the academics are anything like an ivy, just sharing another option that reminded me of the bridging of two worlds of physicality and academic pursuit.