I'm out of the bay area, at a government contractor, with an interesting job. I can afford a huge family, currently with 14 people in the household supported on one income. Life is just easier where the houses are affordable.
I don't know what you'd consider an interesting job or what you'd qualify for, but how seriously have you looked? People can have a bias that stops them: if you allow that the interesting jobs exist, then you have to seriously consider them and ultimately act by moving, but that is a lot to think about and a lot of bother, so therefore there aren't any interesting jobs elsewhere.
If you just want to work at the Big G then might as well move to Seattle with lower CoL and no state income tax.
So you go from paying $2k/month with roommates to maybe $1.5k/month without. Not a huge difference.
Fuck having roommates.
Having a place of your own, shared only with desired family, is fundamental to being an independent adult. Ideally you should even own the land.
But I feel like if you have roommates for financial reasons, you generally don't get the choice.