> shell things
(duplicating from other comments) Bash is indeed not in FreeBSD base; it's easy to install it, but not installing it is also a valid choice. The default login shell doesn't make a big difference, you can use chsh to change that. I also agree POSIX sh isn't quite enough for a lot of scripts.
> [ sysfs, procfs]
These are sort of available, but really just for compatibility with Linux binaries; take a look at the man pages for linsysfs and linprocfs. Just a note to say they're not totally missing, but I would agree they probably don't contain what you're looking for anyway.
> In some cases the sysctl output is not easily machine-parseable. For example, the uptime information from sysctl -n kern.boottime
Depending on how easy it is to process binary values, sysctl -b kern.boottime could be useful here; you'd get two raw integers.
> FreeBSD's netstat -I em0 -bin returns a tabular display,
You might try netstat -I re0 -bin --libxo json or similar. libxo was added in FreeBSD 11.0, and I think got plumbed to the networking commands at least (I see it's not hooked to sysctl in 12.0, so probably not in whatever 11.X pfSense is on either, although it would be useful). check man xo_parse_args for more details.
> nothing recognizes --help
--help is a GNUism; usually the BSD version is -h (although, not for netstat), and yeah, the included help text isn't super useful unless you know what the things mean... pfSense is intended for resource constrained systems, which I guess justifies no man text... but I'd install it it's possible, it's super useful.
> Perl would probably be another good choice
(this isn't accurate, as noted by comments) Perl is a nice choice on FreeBSD, because it is part of the base system (unlike, as you noted, bash). This can sometimes be a bit tricky, if you want a new perl feature, but as long as you're writing run of the mill perl (which everything described here should fit), as long as it's not a positively ancient system, you should be ok.
Anyway; it looks like you've learned quickly; enjoy!