1) The programmer was there once, and probably worked through it on their own. Nobody held their hand.
2) The information being asked is probably in every programming book every written and duplicated hundreds of thousands of times on the internet.
3) Dealing with past programmer-hopefuls has been really disappointing as most of them never get anywhere.
Helping people learn is -awesome-. Holding their hand and doing everything for them is horrifyingly boring and frustrating.
At work, I've had people who were genuinely interested in working hard and learning. They were great and I don't regret a second of the time I spent. These people were generally inclined to look things up for themselves, and only ask for help when they get stuck.
I've had others that I gave way more time than the good learners and they were going nowhere. Then management stepped in and told me I didn't give them enough time and demanded that I spend 1-2 hours every day with them. After weeks of losing 5-10 hours a week, I finally managed to get management to see that no amount of time would help. These people were generally inclined to wait until they could ask a question, instead of looking it up for themselves. It often meant days of non-productivity since they get lost again as soon as you leave their desk.
So to conclude, when a novice programmer asks a really naive question, the first response is to assume they haven't done any legwork on their own, and so the question is really annoying.
The answer is low self-esteem and/or poor social skills.
My youthful experience was that nerds tended to be just as sexually active as jocks. They just tended to be active in different ways.
(And on the flip side, I know a few programmers who are incredibly nice and patient people but still have problems talking to girls. So I'm not denying that some guys find girls intimidating. But I think that inexperience isn't necessarily what leads to poor social skills in other areas.)
I don't associate with many geekier types of people, despite a lot of overlapping interests, for precisely this reason. I'm very sensitive and easily hurt/annoyed by that kind of behavior. So I avoid a lot of things that I'm actively interested in because the crowd is so abominable. The gaming world in particular; I don't even look at games which draw is online play, because I've never found an online gaming community that I've felt comfortable being a part of.
Basically I don't hold with the notion that there is a gang of males deliberately driving women away from tech.
The argument isn't whether or not some people, including many women, are turned off by the current culture of programming. They absolutely are. The argument is whether it's the responsibility of the current culture to try and adjust its ways to let more people in, or if it's okay to let it stay the way it is. People in this thread are making arguments for each side.
After the government forces them to prove they're not pedophiles, of course. Say what you like about the software industry, we don't have ritual humiliation baked into law.