The assumption that those who care about treating others decently can not at the same time be good technologists speaks volumes.
I'm not young anymore, in my 40s, but I have hope that in the next 40 years some of them will stop being a dick and do actual work.
It's never too late to change.
It ain't gonna happen. This is the struggle of every single generation.
I say this as someone that uses gender neutral pronouns etc.
I'm more than ready to agree with you if you can.
I would also like to know, if you don't mind, what you consider to be good reason to "refuse to comply" with addressing someone in a way they prefer to be addressed, by using a three-letter word instead of another three-letter word.