> and now you have a second authentication system ... [and a host of other problems]
You have that anyway. I wasn't suggesting to dump authorized_keys into S3 if you aren't already using S3. I was just using a throwaway example. Any large enough environment to care, is large enough to need to manage this type of resource as a sunk cost.
> somehow running and administering chef/puppet/etc or this S3 bucket is easier
Yes, because it's a sunk cost, and mandatory anyway, outside of any ssh consideration. Any org should be striving to do less things, not more things.
> simple certificate signing service
there's no such thing
> configure multiple roots
You got me there. That is a reasonable enough solution. Of course your 'backup' root has to be offline, but that's the same as with an intermediate. I could probably manufacture a case where having a cert chain is easier but since it's not obvious to me at a moment, I'm sure would be pretty contrived.
But, aren't you getting farther and farther away from simple?
> You have to secure your configuration management that's deploying public keys everywhere and your authorized keys files on every host!
True. However, that's a sunk cost. You have to do that anyway.
> Worst case, you could keep whatever crappy manual process you have for authorizing public key distribution and issue a certificate instead.
Then why bother with the cert at all?
Also, you are insisting that an org's manual process is crappy. If your process for pubkey authz and distribution is crappy, you have crappy practices and it's a sure thing your shiny new CA is a huge liability as another crappily deployed and crappily maintained system.
> It's easier than pubkey authentication at any non-trivial scale.
Well, I dispute that. At large scale you have even better config mgmt and if you're doing it right, can handle either way. CA is still probably better because the benefit to you at large scale is not relief from managing pubkey resources, it's from being able to do short-lived certs as well as an easier route to tighter authz. At moderate scale, get real, these things aren't a concern.
Your main problem isn't that you're wrong, it's that your absolutist view of it is a distortion. (Which makes it wrong.)