I don't doubt any of these expenses, and this hardly seems like a lavish lifestyle... but at the same time, $38k in 401k contributions is hardly middle class. Especially when the median household income in the US is $59k per year.

If you plug that $38k in 401k deductions, and then add say another $10k in employer contribution, assuming you have two parents at age 30 who plan on working for the next 35 years, and who have, to date contributed $10,000 total to their 401k you end out with a $9.0m retirement fund at age 65, assuming a 7% annual growth rate. Going by the 4% withdrawal method you get a $360k annual retirement income which seems a little high.