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It is a myth.

The bigger mail providers (such as Gmail) are pretty strict on checking, and feedback is fairly limited. Thus, figuring out why you were flagged as spam is often difficult and frustrating.

There are so many subtle misconfigurations you can make with the way you have your DNS records set up, but really you need DMARC reports to figure out why your email is getting flagged.

It inspired me to build my startup :) We have successfully fixed dozens of email deliverability issues for our customers.

It's a bit of a black box, but how do you get around this? Is it a matter of domain age? IP trustworthiness? Or do a lot of people have to categorize it as "Not spam" first?

A lot of mail from a variety of providers won't be accepted by gmail. That's the downside of gmail.