This is especially bad when compared to a great first sentance:
"The man in Black fled across the Desert, and the Gunslinger followed." - (Steven King, 1982 "The Gunslinger") [1]
1: https://litreactor.com/columns/the-top-10-best-opening-lines...
"The man in Black fled across the Desert, and the Gunslinger followed." - (Steven King, 1982 "The Gunslinger") [1]
1: https://litreactor.com/columns/the-top-10-best-opening-lines...
The man in Black ambulated with passion across the Desert, and the Gunslinger said I'm gonna do that too.
The Man in Black fled across the desert, and the Gunslinger followed. There was talk of trying to track down a mysterious man who, if not a gun, could be a helpful ally. For a moment, the two could not be sure. The Man in Black was not the same man they had met at the end of the night. But he could be a friend.
As the Man went through the desert and into the darkness of the unknown, he left the gunslinger behind. The gunslinger was in the middle of a trail of shattered bricks. The Man went away.
"Man in Black," said the Gunslinger.
"Gunslinger," said the Man in Black.