India - Dirt, Diarrhea, and Death

Visiting India is a mental game. I'm calm, even-tempered, have traveled quite a bit, and was prepared with stories from Indian and non-Indian friends.* The first 2-3 days in Mumbai were killer. You're assaulted by humidity, heat, smells, sights, sounds, culture, a total lack of personal space or privacy of any kind, and above all: emotion. It's intense.

Eventually, you learn the ground rules: 1) You're never alone. 2) Nearly everyone wants something from you (preferably cash). 3) You're never alone.

If you don't accept these ground rules, you will have a horrible time. You will also miss the best part of India (the people, rivaled closely by their food), because every interaction will be a battle... and the numbers are not in your favor: 1.2 billion to one, and they have unlimited time.

As with all games, coming to terms with the basic rules allows you to really enjoy the sport. When someone strikes up a conversation, talk with them. Even better is to approach people pro-actively. Use your gut, and talk with the people who seem the friendliest.

Examples:

An ayurvedic "doctor" hung out in the lobby of my hotel, and was quite persistant (I still get emails from him). I wasn't interested, and told him so, but every morning there he was! Talking with him gave me an insight into what it means to be an entrepreneur in India, which almost everyone there is.

Another "tour guide" was rather horrible at his profession, but is possibly one of the most interesting people I've ever met. He's learned (quite proficiently) around 7 languages simply from talking to tourists and getting them to send him textbooks (he has never traveled). The man was hilarious, intentionally and non-intentionally, and absorbed information like a sponge.

Another auto-rickshaw driver was trying to scam us at first by taking us to a storefront instead of our desired destination. Finally he admitted that if he took us there, he gets a liter of gasoline from them even if we purchase nothing. After knowing that, we made a deal: we visited several of these high-pressure stores (bought nothing, drank some nice chai) and he drove us around for 4-5 hours, showing us things we never would have seen on our own. Total cost: $0.

Almost all of these people also invited us into their homes, which we usually declined (see rule 2). The few times we didn't we saw a very different picture of India than the author did.

* Pro tip: Things Indians tell you about their country say much, much more about them than about India itself.

I've been to India three times (for one month, for a year and for two weeks) and never thought it was anywhere near as bad as this. Mind you: - I did not try to drag around a 60 pound (?!!) backpack in the middle of the Indian summer. - I did not imagine that visiting tourist sites in the most crowded cities in the middle of the Indian summer would be a fun thing to do. - I learned enough Hindi to tell annoying people to get lost. - I learned to slow down and take it easy.

India is a huge challenge, to be sure, but overall I had more of a shock coming back to North America.

A bit of a perspective from someone who has written plenty about the country:

http://www.gadling.com/2010/09/30/william-dalrymple-india/

Yes, Indian tourist spots have this sort of obsession with whites. Yes, there are indeed lot of poverty-stricken people in sorry state of affairs. I do not refute anything in the article as made-up or untrue.

But.. it is not the complete picture.

I am aghast that such a clearly biased piece has got as many as 6 upvotes at the time of posting this comment.

wow! that's a perspective you don't get from travel guides...