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Comment by djsumdog | Hacker News Reader

I once lived in a Tri-level with a very large and open kitchen. I also lived in a house with very big main rooms but a tiny kitchen.

The trouble is everyone congergrates in the kitchen! That's fine if it's nice and wide and has plenty of counter space, but awful if it's really tiny and the only means between the living room and the patio where your other friend is grilling.

I agree with other comments on how a dining room is kinda useless. If you have a big pot-luck, it feels more relaxed if people are just sitting in various rooms or outside with a paper plate on their lap .. and if it's just you and one other person, a couch works just fine.

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> The trouble is everyone congergrates in the kitchen! That's fine if it's nice and wide and has plenty of counter space, but awful if it's really tiny and the only means between the living room and the patio where your other friend is grilling.

This is one of the many reasons why open floor plans aren't going anywhere. Even without the "entertaining" aspect, people still cook for their families.

I grew up in an early 1900s Coastal Victorian house. While my parents cooked dinner after work in our small kitchen, my brother and I would usually hang out under their feet an in the way. Playing in the living room or upstairs meant we didn't see them until dinner time.

I live in a modern "open concept" now. My wife and I cook dinner after work while the kids play in the dining or living room and nobody has to be forced into isolation. The high-flow If anybody wants alone time, there's a small office downstairs and bedrooms upstairs.

The rule of thumb is that people congregate where the food is. Since the food is usually made in the kitchen, that becomes the default location.

Is a relaxed pot-luck really always what you want, though? I love the ritual of sitting around a table sharing a meal with people you like. It doesn't have to be all fancy, but there's something about gathering together at one time in one place for a shared meal and conversation that does a lot to build and sustain a sense of friendship for me.

I'd really like to have a separate dining room in my house - in fact I've recently hired an architect to plan an extension off the back of the house that would add one!

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