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I’m not sure where where you are but there are a whole host of “Research Chemicals” or RCs that are functional analogues to the more common psychedelics and are in a legal grey area (ex: 4-HO-MET) Also mushroom spors are perfectly legal to buy/posses (in the US) for research purposes.

You'll be fine. Psilocybin has impacted my life (and some of my close friends' lives) for the better.

I can absolutely say that Psilocybin has made me perfectly comfortable being myself and has helped me become a very confident person.

Start with a small dose (2g or so) and just keep experimenting upwards.

Look into making your own dmt and Changa. Best thing I ever did.

Do your safety research (erowid, psychonautwiki) and purchase from a reliable source (the internet is your friend) and you will have a very interesting time.