Comment by jacobolus | Hacker News Reader

Comment by jacobolus | Hacker News Reader

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Checking a diaper and figuring out if they are hungry is a good first step (and I would add burping the baby a bit, and making sure their nose isn’t stuffed up), but the rest of this advice is a bit misdirected in my opinion, and ignores the most effective actionable things parents can do to shush a crying baby.

Namely, what pediatrician Harvey Karp calls the “5 S’s” of (1) swaddling the baby, (2) holding the baby on their side/stomach, (3) loudly shushing in the baby’s ear, (4) swinging the baby back and forth, (5) giving the baby something to suck on.

Go find Dr. Karp’s “happiest baby” video or other videos of people performing these steps, as text posts don’t really convey the idea fully.

These techniques are extremely effective on the vast majority of babies (usually just shushing and swinging is enough for my current newborn), but many new parents don’t know about them or do them improperly. In particular, shushing needs to be a very loud constant white noise, and the rocking/jiggling/swinging of the baby should be a bit more vigorous than new parents might naturally do.

I don’t like the wording of 4. Don’t swing the baby. Rock the baby gently. The movement is often a distraction and soothing them. Swinging almost sounds like you’re shaking them. (I know we are referring to the same thing just don’t like the word swing)

When my Daughter was born I was the one who dealt with her at night time for 4 weeks after our confinement nanny left. To get her to sleep I would swaddle her, hold her on her side in my arms and rock her gently while saying “shushhhhhhhhh in her ear till she calmed down” she would fall asleep in about 2 minutes. Then I would place her in the cot slowly and pat her bum for 5 minutes. Then she would sleep for 3-4 hours till next feed.

I had never heard of the 5 S’s but the similar things I did they do work.

You are more or less “shaking” them, or maybe “firmly jiggling” would be a better description. It’s not like the shaking you would use for a cocktail, but neither the word “swinging” nor the word “rocking” really describes the motion you want either. If the baby is really crying hard, you don’t want your motion to be too “gentle”; you want to match the intensity of their crying with your motion and shushing.

Try to find a video demonstrating; it’s quite hard to convey the appropriate amount of vigor with text.

I copied my wife’s motions when we had our first. She worked in child care for a while, and (when standing) does this sort of 2-phase motion: sway back and forth at about 1 Hz plus a up/down light bounce at about 3 Hz. Works well in my experience.

It's easy to accidentally shaky a baby too hard if you juggle it, especially when you are tired or frustrated so generally it's a safer bet to hold the baby pressed to your body, so any swinging the baby does is swinging your body is doing too (swiveling and bouncing), protecting your baby from shaking.

Note, I would recommend against juggling a baby. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Juggling

Also adults should never take out their own frustration/anger on a baby. That’s not what we are talking about here.

It’s not that easy to accidentally shake a baby too hard. Babies are quite robust, and new parents (that I have seen anyway) are almost all extremely cautious. But make sure the baby is fully supported; you don’t want their head flopping around.

Go watch the nurses/midwives/doctors in a maternity ward sometime and you will see them manhandling newborns in ways that make new parents nearby feel pretty anxious... but the babies are just fine.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sB2Fw3MFlhk (The original Happiest Baby video has a bunch more examples with live crying babies and makes it a bit clearer. I don’t know if those are online anywhere though.)

We had a fussy baby and somehow I got hold of this book. "Well that won't work", I thought. But sure enough, she started crying, I put her on her stomach on my underarm (like a football), swaddled and shushed, and it worked like a charm! And indeed, I had to swing her a bit harder than you would expect (not to the point where it would feel uncomfortable, of course).

Also: vacuum cleaners make great white noise machines.

In England this hold is sometimes called "tiger in the tree". (First result from DDG which I'm using just for the image) http://dadabouttown.com/the-tiger-in-the-tree-hold/

Never heard that, I'm in UK and know it as "hold them like a rugby ball".

"Rugby hold" is also a breast-feeding position.

But also, just experiment with your kid! Mine did not like loud noises or big movements. That's cool. When it was time for kid to sleep, we left kid to sleep -- and kid went to sleep with no mechanical aid. Kid hates white noise, as do I. It was good to find this out -- saved us all hours of bouncing and rocking and shushing.

A lot of this seems to be suggestive of the womb: shushing (like a heart beat or breathing), fixing the temperature and light, swaddling, rocking...

Yes that is exactly the idea.

Nice....

If I was a kid and not a Man I maybe find some use for this one,

But no!

I wish all the babies be well, mine 4 beauties, and all other babies in the world

What you wish for others is what God will give you!

"4th trimester" is was Karp calls it.

#4, and #5 for sure.

My niece was upset due to just being fed and her stomach having the usual baby issues, a bit of jiggling on my lap with my little finger to suck on calmed her right down as mum was having a bit of a meltdown due to lack of sleep, and baby being super demanding. Niece was asleep in no time due to being handled confidently and noticing what was working and what wasn't.

One size most certainly doesn't fit all.

What would you recommend as number 5?

Some babies like their pacifiers/dummies, some like a clean little finger for #5

Sorry for the late response ... Notifications don't seem to be a thing on this site.

These techniques are so, so effective. The video is probably the best single gift anyone can give to a new parent.

We’re currently renting the SNOO, which is a bassinet that automates some of this stuff for pre-crawling babies. It’s been very effective in helping our youngest sleep through the night at a much earlier age than her older sister. It’s basically a robot night nanny.

1 and 2 worked for me. But bear in mind that these are tricks to avoid or induce newborn reflexes. They will all stop working within a few months as they outgrow instinctive behavior.

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