More specifically, I'm bothered by the fact that if you get into a crash in a Tesla, Tesla can disable your car and stop it from activating unless you do repairs at their approved dealership. You can't just buy parts from a scrapyard and get it running again, Tesla is the gatekeeper and they don't let anyone else hold the keys(they don't even release service manuals unless absolutely required by law). In contrast I could buy a brand new Mercedes CLS with its very respectable smart cruise control and Mercedes can't do anything to stop me from replacing the engine, the head unit, or fixing the whole thing if it's totalled - they just can't. It's not a freedom I'm willing to lose by buying a Tesla.
I knew I'd find someone here who hates when John Deere locks down their vehicles, but is fine when Elon Musk does.
If you think this is a new thing, you haven't followed the car industry much.
Just as an example, my 2002 el cheapo Peugot was bought without the option to show instantaneous MPG/average MPG/range/etc. Spend two hours soldering/gluing on the missing $2 toggle switch, ask a friend with the Peugeot Planet update tool to enable it in software, and Bob's your auntie.
It goes much further than that though, especially when you get into chip tuning. Software upgrades that add 50 horsepower to your engine output are commonplace.
But as for the "actively hostile to 3rd party repairs/mods", this part scares me to.
It's the same thing they ran into with the software locked batteries. The goal is to have minimal overhead to try to drive costs down on Model 3, and making the SR just a software limited version of SR+ actually ends up pushing the overall cost down, rather than having to set up an entirely different line that does the cloth seats and the aluminum roof.