Comment by manmal | Hacker News Reader

Comment by manmal | Hacker News Reader

Chronic stress sets you up for so many diseases, where burnout is just an early warning sign in comparison. Cancer, heart disease, stroke - you name it, chances are way higher that you get it if you are under chronic stress. Being a freelancer with 2 little kids, I‘ve had my fair share of stress (and burnout), but I‘m doing quite well nowadays. So, here‘s my personal anti-stress toolbox, from most effective to least effective:

- Stoic philosophy. Accept that you have control over nothing (only the chance to influence) and eventually that feeling that you carry the world on your shoulders will disappear.

- Stoic philosophy (just to reiterate how important it is)

- Near infrared radiation - improves mitochondrial function and releases NO (a radical caused by cell stress) from the mitochondria. There are plenty of options, i have a device from redlightman.

- CBD - I vape it regularly. It’s legal where I live, but it’s illegal in some countries and US states. It believe it had a tremendous effect on me, even increased sociability.

- Blue light blocking glasses - Staring at my laptop screen for longer periods stresses me out, and using f.lux all day improves this a lot. But using the blue blockers is something different entirely. Sometimes I put on the glasses in the early afternoon and am more focused and relaxed as a result. Sleep also got much better, sometimes I fall asleep while coding in the evening. Take care to use the really yellow/orange ones, as the only-slightly-tinged ones don’t filter heavily enough.

- Sort out family problems, ASAP. Don’t feel stuck - if you do, just do _something_, even if it’s dumb. Feeling stuck kills you. You need to feel accepted by the people you are close to. You need someone you tell your (supposedly) darkest secrets without them condemning you.

- Find a job or position where your „boss“ values you and your work. For me as a freelancer this means I only work with clients for whom the project is important, or even vital (not just a cost-factor).

"Stoic philosophy. Accept that you have control over nothing (only the chance to influence)"

You have control over your reaction to things. And I think this is a key component of Stoicism, especially in the modern working world.

If you are acting (and reacting) true to yourself, then it is other's reactions to your actions that are failing. This goes a long way to reducing the amount of stress felt.

Thanks for the insights.

I‘d like to differ here: „You have control over your reaction to things.“.

I‘ve had my fair share of yelling at my kids, and regretting it afterwards. Or writing an inflammatory email response. Obviously, I don’t have full control over my reaction, even though I think I‘m a rather careful person. I do have a strong influence, that’s for sure.

I‘ve stopped beating myself up for knee-jerking something. The unconscious has so much control over what surfaces next. I think it was an article here on HN recently that claimed that decisions are formed up to 12 seconds before they become conscious.

You can train and improve the control you have over your reactions - the knee-jerk doesn't need to materialize into anything more than the initial feeling if you practice mindfulness for long enough. Definitely still not worth beating yourself up for anything that has already happened, but in my own experience, taking note and improving how I mentally and physically act in response to feelings has made my life immeasurably better over time

I think this methodology is a kind of recipe for detaching from yourself completely, leave out the last two clauses which I do like. But, philosophy of suppressing emotions seasoned with substances which inhibit Default Mode Network in your brain? Sure thing if you have failed or feel stuck as a short term remedy, but ain't you gonna lose yourself if do it regularly?

On the contrary, stoicism helps you re-attach, especially if reality as perceived with your old mindset has become unbearable. Think of it as a way of viewing things, and less of suppressing anything. Emotions are generated as a reaction to your perception of reality - you will be fed up by the stranger running a red light, but your anger will swing to concern if you learn that they are heading towards an emergency room. Emotions are really just communicators of the reality you perceive. Stoicism might help you adjust your perception where it is just plain wrong. That’s BTW also how cognitive behavioral therapy works, just with the aid of a professional.

I‘m not sure what you mean with Default Mode Network inhibition. CBD is a cannabinoid, and those are present in all mammal bodies - it’s just an aid for faster repair, especially nerves and brain. You might find your brain working better and clearer, because it regenerates faster.

I understand, if you got your emotions cross-wired by crooked society, then you can put emotions on hold and rethink logically about what's happening. So stoicism is like a negative imprint of mindfulness, something like a maintenance mode. Mindfulness is about to stay present with both emotional and rational, and not trying to rationalize feelings.

DMN is an ancient part of brain which acts like primitive unconscious task scheduler. When it goes nuts, you binge on substances and reset it, then sober up and feel happy. Something like that.

Mindfulness and stoicism aren't opposing approaches, they complement one another. Stoicism ≠ being stoic

Stoicism is a form of mindfulness. You seem to be misunderstand everything I say, so I'll show myself out.

stoic philosophy is no good for the mind. actually feeling your emotions is healthy. it's stuffing them down that makes people crazy or likewise numbed out. this is a difficult truth to understand.

vaping is a poison - clearly. addictions just keep you on the cycle.

real acceptance is powerful but it comes from a place of being connected to yourself which means your emotions. trying to suppress them isn't living since you are suppressing your very nature.

It seems like you don't know much about stoic philosophy, and are guessing that the modern meaning of "stoic" describes it. It does not, and in fact it is more in line with your second to last sentence: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stoicism#Ethics_and_virtues

In a healthy mind, there is a causal hierarchy: Reality > your perception of reality > emotions (strongly simplified!). You are suggesting that stoicism means manipulating emotions, at the bottom of the hierarchy. What (to me) it means is manipulating the perception of reality. I agree that shoving aside emotions won’t do you much good, except in the short term (e.g. not punching the boss in the face). Long term emotion suppression will make you depressed. Stoicism doesn’t tell you that you must not be angry. It tells you that your boss is actually not in control of the situation herself, and also does not control your own destiny - her bad decision is suddenly only an annoyance, and not a life-threatening event. And your emotions will adjust accordingly.

Vaping nicotine 20 times a day is obviously a bad idea and might lead to cancer. Vaping 2 draws of CBD (a non-addictive substance) 2-3 times per week might also have a negative long term effect, but I’ll take it. I don’t use propylene glycol, but only vegetable glycerine to minimize risk.

> In a healthy mind, there is a causal hierarchy: Reality > your perception of reality > emotions (strongly simplified!).

That's certainly the conceit of rationality, but realistically the last two have a complex two-way relationship where often, perhaps most often, the reverse order of those two elements dominates.

I agree that, short-term, emotions change perception of reality. Or at least, past trauma and other experiences from the past feed heavily into perception. But my own experience is that the link from perception to emotions is more profound and effective. A few words, formulating crucial information, can turn around your emotions 180 degrees. „I‘m pregnant“, „You have cancer“, „I‘m sorry“, etc. The other direction seems way more subtle to me.

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