I've struggled with my weight my entire adult life. Ups and downs, diets and exercise. In the last six months I think I finally found a method that works for me and can be maintained indefinitely. (I'm down about 60 pounds now.)
To start with, I ceased trying to control my eating. I could do it for quite awhile, but eventually I'd get sick or something would happen and I'd fall off the wagon. Studies on the subject say that caloric restriction doesn't work in the long-term. Instead I just altered my diet. I can eat whatever I want, as long as 80% of what I eat is vegetables (corn and potatoes are excluded from "vegetables" as they are extremely starchy.) My breakfast is frequently two scrambled eggs and a gallon zip-loc baggy fully of peppers, onions and mushrooms. Try to avoid carbs, but don't kill yourself doing so. Sometimes I'll have oatmeal for breakfast instead (with a bunch of veg.) For some godawful reason, "Dietary Fiber" is put under the umbrella of carbs. They don't count because your body can't digest them. Subtract the amount of fiber from the carb count. That's the number you should care about. When in doubt, consult a diabetic website, those folks are magicians at avoiding carbs. Not all carbs are equal, refined sugar and fructose are the worst, so avoid them like the plague.
I exercise every day. I enjoy playing video games, so I got a recumbent exercise bike and I only play video games while exercising. It took me awhile to build up stamina, but now I'll do an hour in the morning before work, and an hour after work. If I'm sick or not feeling well, I get on the bike anyway, and when I feel like I'm suffering, I stop. Make it a habit. As long as I only play video games while exercising, I stopped budgeting for video games. I simply buy whatever I want because now it's a health expense.
I prioritize sleep above all else. Above work, above relationships. Sleep first. If you have insurance, get a sleep study done and see if you can improve your sleep further. Studies suggest that sleep is a more important factor than what you eat, even.
I try to lift weights two or three times a week. I spent a long time overthinking weight lifting. Programs and styles and such. Find something heavy and move it around until you're tired. You don't need to be Mr. Universe, just strain your muscles a bit.
Finally, forgive yourself for fucking up, because you will fuck up. Don't beat yourself up for it. Guilt held me back for a long time.