Business networking is overrated (2017)
nytimes.com
nytimes.com
(I'm happy with my remote job. Most useful contacts and rewarding relationships I had came from off-job work. It's communities that I miss.)
And yes, I also got almost all of my jobs through my network including LinkedIn, all formal tests I did - even when I passed - were for jobs that I didn't take in the end. Oftentimes because those weren't paid so well or because the perks were lousy. YMMV if you work for one of the big companies.
Networking won't help you get hired at a top tech company if you cannot perform well on "whiteboard interviews". It generally doesn't matter that you have an internal referral. If you don't do well on the whiteboard, it's a no-hire regardless of network. Even famous people get turned away for failing on the whiteboard. e.g. the creator of Homebrew[0] when he interviewed @ Google[1].
[0] https://brew.sh/
If you want something from people (like a job, their time or their money) then you should probably build trust and a connection with those people. That's called networking.
I think "networking" covers a lot of different behaviours and I am always interested in which ones work
It's the people I consider friends that I want to reach out to about working with, and I know that these people would be advocates for me within their respective organizations.
Or for non-clients, just taking time to ask how they're doing, what's new or really showing any spontaneous interest in their life or career. It's amazing how many times I checked in with people that it would remind them of someone they overheard needing consulting.
"For me to join a network the network has to match these criteria:
* It markets itself as exclusive
* It costs money (say $2k/y for small businesses and scaling prices depending on number of employees)
* Participants are owners or at C-level
The networks are often dinners where the participants get to know each other in friendly settings. I aim for networks with high middle age where I stick out as the younger (am mid-thirties) professional which connects tech with business needs (my niche).
While at a network, do not talk about yourself. Ask about others businesses and interests. These sells take between 6-12 months and are based on trust.
You also need to come prepared.
* Dress as expected.
* Have a web page with referrals so when leads get a bit nosy and Google you you're #1 in search and the page provides the lead with info about great work you've done. I have about 100 visits / mo to my page (my weird name helps for the #1 pos). 90% are primed leads.
* Know your oneliners. Prepare examples of things you can provide. Make them sound natural. Say it without selling in an informal way.
It's about being systematic and selecting only the networks where your dream leads go to. Hoping to get into invite only networks further on."
It's still going strong and we double our billing each year.
Given that they market themselves as "exclusive" I suppose I won't find them in meetup.com but still you need to get started somewhere...
I Google my way - City + business network.
I also ask people I meet in business about their preferred networks, but only people I would like as a client.
Work your way from there. The networks want to be found, they want your money after all.
Edit, about starting somewhere: Some people work to connect businesses. Depending on your location, these can be Chamber of Commerce, Science Parks, tech hubs etc. Start by asking there and get yourself connected with the formal connections first.
https://www.gocomics.com/frazz/2015/03/26
The response is "I don't exercise. I like doing stuff that happens to be exercise."
The kid isn't impressed, but this is an important distinction. It's true of almost every exercise that anyone does. After being introduced to mathematical induction, I spent a while repeatedly writing out the proof that the sum of the first n odd numbers is the square of n. I did that because it was fun for me. Most people would think I was completely out of my mind -- if they had to do that, they'd happily pay you to be allowed to stop.
If an endeavor requires two things, A and B, and A comes naturally to you while even a tiny amount of B is pure agony, you're going to complain about the excessive importance of B. You'll see other people complaining about how important A is, and think they're crazy, because there are barely any demands for A at all -- in your mind. You don't perceive the requirement for A because you just have the natural level of A, and it's more than enough.
I'm pretty sure this entirely explains both the literature saying how important networking is, and the literature expressing bafflement at how overrated networking is.
Which makes sense. Those events tend to be about 99.99% desperate business people try to sell you something, and don't really attract the attention of anyone they'd need to attract nor the level of genuine closeness you'd need anyway. It's like the offline equivalents of those 'promotion forums' and subreddits you see online; absolutely depressing as hell because no one cares about anything other than selling themselves and no one in their actual market is around to take them up on the offer. In the same way you can't create the next Facebook by solely marketing to people who want to create the next Facebook, you can't make useful connections from events where everyone has the same self centred goals.
Yeah there were a few pyramid schemes and coffee places at ours, but there were a few people looking to problem solve.
But I dont think anyone was successful. I'm looking for a experienced business mentor, lawyer, or co-engineer. None to be found.
Silicon Valley is built on networking - the referral paths that lead to talent, capital, opportunities - it's all invite only. That's by design.
Platforms won't solve this. I'm in recruiting, where we're supposedly always about to be disrupted. But the platforms don't solve the two big recruitment problems - 1: you don't need more candidates, you just need a few very good ones and 2: people who have good opportunities don't broadly see the value in setting themselves up on platforms to "just look". But a lot of unqualified tyre kickers do.
I think the point is that "shallow networking" is useless. Simply because I have your business card (or we're connected on LinkedIn), does not mean that I am in your "network", or vice versa.
I think I have quite an extensive "network" (people with whom I meet regularly and who are willing to help with introductions/events/etc).
That has taken a number of years to grow, and most of those relationships started because I helped them out with something, with no expectation of return. In other words, I actually was in a position to help, and I actually delivered.
There's a lot of compounding/snowballing too - every person you help usually introduces you to two or three others over the course of the relationship. It's not even a "you scratch my back, I'll scratch yours" - I'm genuinely interested in helping out anyone I can.
I would argue that it depends on what you are aiming for, and what your desired outcome is. If there is attrition in your field, figure out why people lose. Is it incompetence, a terminal lack of guanxi, or did they get layered by someone from the right school?
(from ddg) guanxi: Guanxi describes the rudimentary dynamic in personalized social networks of influence and is a central idea in Chinese society.
Security startups, pure performance and relationships, with credentials a distant third. Historically anyway, it's changing.
Since we're talking power, not rewards, relationships and credentials appear to trump raw performance at some FAANGs as their business models professionalize.
Impression is venture funding goes to whoever fits the profile, so ivy credentials with relationships have the advantage over performance.
Different stages weight accordingly. The best businesses require the least competence to operate and maintain, so maturity converges on incompetent, nepotistic snake pits. :)
You basically think everyone is a shark trying to get to you.
When you are relaxed at a bar (alcohol helps), you think people are chilling out; and you tend to believe what the other guy is saying.
Here is another one: Airplanes. I have made some very good friends just by sitting next to someone. (and some very interesting stories).
Another one which is a win-win: High caliber girls which introduces you to their circles. Usually it's a set of another "good" girls that have boyfriends who are rather established.
Another one is being married and meeting other married people through kids activity. I'm speculating here I have never been through that.
you're missing a lot of interpersonal value if that's your conclusion. on the converse, it wouldn't be surprising if those circles quietly distanced themselves from such self-centeredness.
I've received some big breaks by knowing the correct people, but not a single one of them has been a 2-minute connection from some BS networking event. It's always been a preexisting, unrelated relationship which eventually becomes career relevant.
I'm shocked by the number of seniors/recent grads who contact me out of the blue (god knows where they got my info) asking for recommendations or a break. No, I'm not going to stick my neck out by recommending someone I've never met for an open position.
Mind you. I am often happy to respond to a few questions in an email (or even a quick call) from pretty much anyone. Though a good percentage of the time, when I do that I don't get so much as a Gmail form "Thanks."
So what I do is ask for a CV and cover letter; if they're good I can upload all the documents straight into the HR system and save the candidate the trouble.
In my experience, only a small minority of the cold outreach people actually respond to my request, and the responses I do get are usually low quality and don't merit a referral.
However, contrast with "Networking" with a capital-N in the giving out business cards like candy at some business networking cocktail party. It's probably a combination of how deep the connection is as you say and just the general attitude that tends to pervade those sorts of events.
OTOH, post long-term job #1 I was relatively senior and didn't have a background that was particularly appealing to a lot of the cool young companies of the era. But I did have former co-workers at one place that gave me a quick offer. And, since then, it's been pretty specialized roles that came pretty much 100% through ongoing professional relationships.
If you helped some remote contact of yours somehow(knowledge, connections, maybe even just lending a hand when he needed), I'm sure he would be much more likely to return the favor.
It does a few things differently that I've enjoyed.
1) It's over lunch. it doesn't require an obligation that takes me away from my loved ones in the evening. I'm going to eat lunch anyways, might as well do it with a group of friends or strangers.
2) We don't have to small talk. There's a game involved. There's rules to that help us to talk to each other. It's so much easier to do so then.
3) Playing a game deepens these relationships. I can't even explain it. But it's this artificial conflict that's been creating these stronger bonds with these folks I'm playing a game with. I can't wait to play the next game with them and have our chats afterwards.
4) The game I picked was important. I picked "The Resistance". It's similar to Mafia/Werewolf where you're basically all trying to figure out who's lying to you. So the game isn't what most folks think about when they think a game with cards or board games. It's really just talking and learning how people express themselves.
So it really goes deep in examining people and having them examine you. It's a weird feeling to go through that type of process with acquaintances. But every time I've played a "lying game" like Mafia/Resistance with a group of acquaintances or new folks, I'm so much more comfortable talking to them about so many other things.
It's been fun. I've been told by some folks it's in their top meetups they've ever done, and it takes ridiculously low effort. Just email some people to show up and play a game. Don't need to shell out for food/drinks/speakers/other garbage.
(I'm in Chicago doing this. If anyone here wants to come and play hit me up.)
Sounds a little bit too close to Diplomacy. A game that has famously ruined friendships. The stated goal of Diplomacy is not to figure out who's lying, but that is the actual goal.
I've also never gotten a client through a personal or non-work connection. I don't think my social or family network is ritzy enough for that to work.
The author has experience on the networking side of the fence and it's interesting to hear their point of view.
As someone who has experience on the value creation side of the fence (I created a popular open source project), as much as I wish the previous statement were true, it's not.
The problem is that wealthy investors don't know the difference between apparent value and real value. It's just too complex for them to understand and they just don't have the time. Also, investors expect talent to come to them not the other way round. Another factor is that things that only appear valuable tend deliver faster exits so they may be optimizing for smooth-talkers with a sleek pitch deck rather than long term value creation.
I've worked in many companies where the manager doesn't know the difference between a good engineer and a bad one. It's extremely frustrating. You would think that these kinds of companies would go bankrupt eventually but no; they have a monopoly over their niche/sector so engineering quality does not matter at all. They can hire 100 times more people than they need and produce horrible complex code which requires constant maintenance and it will only represent a tiny dent in their budget.
If most engineering managers don't know what a good software engineer is, how can a VC or investor know? Just because they worked at Google and can solve the Tower of Hanoi puzzle using recursion does not make them a good engineer
I do a significant amount of business in Japan, and the Japanese perceive America to be all about networking. The reason being, in Japan most folks stay at the same company their entire life, there is no need to really network.
Don’t you still need to network within the company, network to find customers, network to find mentors, and so on?
As someone who personally grew up with and knows at least one relatively famous one of these, you're not going to replace him.
The first rule of networking: If you're clearly doing it to further a career, you will fail.
A lot of people criticize it, but "Never Eat Alone" is worth a read.
So the take-home message is don't network, just physically spam celebrities with your product. Got it.
If this article could gain that higher source of truth I'd argue it's a heck of a bombshell to the conversation...otherwise my experience and many others in comments below seem to differ.