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Comment by whitepoplar | Hacker News Reader

My parents are set to turn 70 next year and I worry so much about their wellbeing when they get older. My dad, in particular, is a generally happy person, but doesn't have many friends. I worry that if my mom passes before him, he's going to have a rough time. I feel guilty because I'm one of those children described in the article who moved to another city to chase economic + social activity.

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We've all done it, and often had to, which is the root of the problem.

When I was under 10, both sets of grandparents and four of five aunts and uncles were within 10 miles, most under 3. Now we're all over the place and a visit isn't a regular frequent thing but a major, rarer, trip.

As I'm in my mid fifties some of the future looks rather bleak. Add longer life expectancy after retirement and for most, better mental and physical health, and you end up with many more years to contemplate your loneliness.

I saw one story a few years back of a retirement home that combined a nursery. Which turned out to be a huge boost for both the kid's development, parents, and the old folks. Every day they would have joint activities. Sounded a great idea that we need far more of, rather than occasional novelty worth reporting.

Last I'd heard, American labour mobility had been declining for decades. In 2011, the percentage of US residents who moved to a different state for work was half the rate from 1991 [1]. Though, I'd be curious to see what the data looks like beyond those dates.

[1]: https://www.economist.com/finance-and-economics/2012/07/07/m...

I'd be interested in similar for the UK, but can't quickly turn up a similar graph or stats for here. I'm now curious of the picture since the war, as the picture for families seems to have changed quite significantly.

https://www.gimletmedia.com/reply-all/101-minka

This podcast episode is all about getting rid of nursing homes and it sort of talks about the way it should be. Communal, and a split of ages.

As I read this, I was envisioning a plant nursery, which I thought was a genius idea. Give the old people something simple to do like take care of plants! I guess children would work too. :)

Not all of us have done it. I'm staying in the Midwest as a software engineer so I can be near my parents. I might not make 300k but I'm doing well and I see my family once a week at least.

It just depends what your priorities are. Cats in the cradle.

If I lived closer to my parents, I could totally forget about ever dating again. Sorry, a lifetime of loneliness isn't worth that.

Total non sequitur but I think there is an opportunity for old folks homes with organized lan/online gaming. Probably still 15-30 years out until games start entering retirement communities in droves but maybe with the right promotion it could get started earlier?

You already see this in many online games. There are over 60 only clans on steam when I looked years ago. Its a great way to 'socialize' when you arent very mobile.

i don't think it's that far, if you were 25-30yo gamer in middle of 90s, you would be now 50-55yo, 10-15 years from being 65-70 which doesn't sound like that low age to move to retirement home

My grandmother, who recently passed at 103, used to have "bowling" night on the Wii with her friends at an adult community home (when she was in her 90's). The right games for the right people.

From the article it looks like a much better and cheaper solution is to build retirement homes for the elderly. Is it feasible to write to one's political representative in Japan?

>Is it feasible to write to one's political representative in Japan?

Because that ever achieved anything in the US, except letting off steam?

Japan is decidedly not the United States. In some European countries like Germany writing to one's representative damn works, and works well; in Switzerland the situation is even better, the people decide directly and as the consequence the government is afraid of the people, which is as it should be.

Looking at everything through the lens of how things are in the United States is dimwitted, to put it very considerately and politely.

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