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Comment by shioyama | Hacker News Reader

Completely agree.

> After age 9 or so, they really can go off on their own without parents around.

I'd say more like age six, depending on the kid. Kids are much more independent and aware than adults give them credit for.

> I wish I could tell more parents to let fucking go.

It's ironic that just doing this -- letting go -- would probably do more good than any "educational" activity they schedule into their kids' lives.

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Yup. Parents think that they are helping their kid by doing everything for them, but really ,they are hurting them.

It should be a gradual process of teaching a kid how to be independent and have independent skills from the time they are toddlers.

Kids really appreciate being taught patiently how to do a life skill.

And if they don't want to learn how to do laundry, you make them learn.

Amen! My favorite thing I've learned as a Boy Scout leader is the EDGE method of learning (Explain, Demonstrate, Guide, and Enable). If we as parents spent more time teaching our kids skills in a methodical way (which doesn't necessarily mean doing so in a lengthy way), then our kids would feel so much more empowered to be truly independent. I've also found that taking the the approach of "inviting" them to learn a new skill (and using the EDGE method to teach it) can be so much more powerful than attempting to force them to learn. When we do that, we often default to teaching them using only one method rather than the multi-method approach of EDGE.

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