Personally I have no appetite for breaking any customer. Sure they may be "in the wrong" because they have
an old dig recipe, or a load balancer health check tool, or a latency measurers, or some kind of DNS canary, that mistakenly used a wrong EDNS version, but if we change our behavior and break them they will a) feel it viscerally and b) rightly, blame us for breaking things. We're pretty serious about maintaining backwards compatibility always and treating every API like a promise.
The other side of this is that being too tolerant can lead to network ossification. This impacted TLS1.3's roll-out, which had to be made to look similar enough to TLS1.2 session resumption that many network middle boxes can't tell the difference and let the traffic through. This is less elegant than a cleaner new design that isn't tainted by having to appear like the old formats.
Personally, I worry about this a lot less and consider the extra effort to be backwards compatible very worth it. It think it will still be very easy to find totally unused never-seen-in-the-wild EDNS version numbers; there's no shortage. On the TLS working group we've been through this a few times, having to find unused magic numbers that hadn't been burned as part of the various experiments. We've done with this protocol versions, cipher suites, etc.
On the DNS side; the proposed hypothetical EDNS version negotiation scheme that might show up in the future requires round-trips and state. Resolvers would have to first send an EDNSv1 query, observe it fail, store that state somewhere and then try with EDNSv0. What if the authoritative server rolls back their support? What if the auth service is mixed and only some of the fleet supports the new version? These challenges tend to make that kind of version negotiation impractical ... hence my skepticism that it will ever work like that.
A small part of all this is that the DNS WG isn't really stewarded with these practical issues front of mind. DNAME and DNSSEC have each had backwards-incompatible implications that real-world operators had to fudge around and ignore precisely what the specs say, to be able to satisfy customers. Due to that history, IMO the DNS specs have lost a certain level of moral authority that other specifications still enjoy.