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But where is the swoosh?.. and the globe. The globe is like the dot in dot com. Also that type needs to be leaning to the right.. like it's moving forward at speed.. leaning in...

It's interesting that most of the prominent brands don't follow such rules. They overwhelmingly stick to just two colors (or one in many cases).

Amazon.com, Apple, McDonald's, Walmart, Fedex, UPS, Nike, Coca Cola, 3M, Target, Visa, Square, PayPal, Facebook, Uber, Lyft, Twitter, YouTube, Netflix, Samsung, Sony, Intel, Cisco, Oracle, IBM, SAP, Starbucks, Lululemon, Under Armour, NY Times, American Express, GAP, Best Buy, Costco, Exxon

Rainbows and unicorns... Apple (pre-Miyake), Microsoft, Google

Is this good advice or satire?

I can't imagine this wasn't 100% sarcasm...

If you had to ask, please don't ever design logos.

What's the rationale?

I was thought quite the opposite for logos (re: colors): fewer colors is better, and the logo should be instantly recognizable in monochrome. It being something a layperson could draw reasonably well is also a good thing.

Edit: Did I just miss the sarcasm train here? It's very possible.

Yes, it's definitely sarcasm.