Read this; it's a tad old, but still a very good read and while a few specifics have been fixed the overall argument is still perfectly sound: https://eev.ee/blog/2012/04/09/php-a-fractal-of-bad-design/
The trick is being aware of the pitfalls. Just because an application is written in PHP does not make it inherently bad, just as an application written in (e.g.) Rust does not make it inherently good.
One requires that you think a certain way in order to function at all. The other requires only that you can solve problems, but makes no guarantees that your solution will be the optimal one.
Regardless of language, the criteria you need to keep in mind is this:
> Am I solving a problem for people in a way that is better than other available solutions?
That's a feature in my eyes. Languages with too much freedom -- C++, PHP, Javascript and many others -- suffer from (a) lack of idiomatic syntax or ways of doing basic things like map&reduce; even finding an element in a list, or formating a date/time have many library choices, and (b) give you plenty of ways to shoot yourself in the foot.
Opinionated tech is a protection against a class of brain defects of the human programmers. You cannot keep track of 50+ potential dangers in your head all the time. You will inevitably make a mistake. Opinionated tech reduces the count of things you have to constantly be aware of.
So again, feature, not a bug.
If you must rag on PHP, presumably after some contemplation of the beam in your own eye, then this would be best accomplished by a more neutral and factual presentation, such as phpsadness.com. Spreading an angry, dismissive, fact-light rant is just poo-flinging.